Silver Lining

When Friday is your Sunday, it kind of sucks when it rains on a Friday. But to tell you the truth, it's kind of nice to have an excuse to stay inside watching The Boys from Brazil, or any other movie about Nazi hunters really.

There are only a few more days until my little idiots receive their results from the May SAT, and, if the government is paying attention, perhaps a few deportation notices in the interest of preserving the nation's future. I can only hope that they cheated.

The Good Book

Am I of an age, right now, at which 9:30 AM is early or just the morning? After spending a blistering 24 hours with some old college companions in their final semester, it seems somehow different than it once was. Much, much worse.

I've just started reading this book, perhaps you've heard of it -- The Bible. I guess that's not really true, but I did just check out the wikipedia page about the Book of Esther, which turned me on to Sodom and Gomorrha (get it?!?!?), leading me in a somewhat roundabout way back to the Book of Samuel. Regardless, check it: I stumbled across this quotation from the Song of Hannah:

Talk no more so very proudly,
Let not arrogance come from
your mouth;
for the Lord is a God of
knowledge,
and by him actions are
weighed. (1 Samuel 2.3)

Out of the park, Sammy. Out of the park.

Getting My Work Done

My inability to keep this little dream alive is trending hard toward embarrassing. Simply put, I'm leading the league in abandoned enterprises. In truth, my behavior since breaking the seal on Sleepy Pete has raised more than a few questions for me. Am I just a natural quitter? Will I ever be able to stick with anything for more than a few weeks at a time? Was that the series finale of 'Rob & Big' or just a season finale? In the spirit of the release of Ruth Wisse's new addition to the Nextbook series from Schocken Books entitled 'Jews and Power,' allow me to paraphrase the Rabbis: the inquiry is not ours to finish, but neither are we free to stop asking. I really hope it was just a season finale.

But listen, this post has a different purpose. I've realized what's been plaguing me about my inattentiveness -- I need to be a little more real and talk about my job a bit. If nothing else, at least this will level the playing field with all you finance pricks talking about p/e ratios over your sesame chicken. So here it is.

Today I called a parent of one of my students -- let's call him Daniel Green -- to confirm an appointment for tomorrow. When I called the house and a male voice answered the phone, I instinctively said "Hi, Mr. Green?" Hearing back a flat "No," I assumed I had misdialed or accidentally called the wrong student's house. But after a pause and muffled apology, this followed: "No. Dr. Green." Sometimes things happen in life that would be unrealistic or maybe just a bit much if they were to happen on tv or in a movie. Finding yourself speechless in the most literal sense of the word doesn't happen on the day to day. Either way, is it possible to be more arrogant than this? What kind of doctor could he possibly be that the title is so important at all times? I can only think of one man who can reasonably make such a request, and Dr. Green you are no Dr. Dre.

Out of Hibernation

Ahh, it's nice to be back. I know it's been a while, but it's like that famous quote -- was it George Washington, I believe, or maybe Sleepy Pete? -- "it's mad hard to keep a blog going if you're any brand of normal." And besides, nothing changes.

I really don't have anything to say at all in this particular moment, but I just wanted to let those of you blog lining me (wink, Freddy!) that this is still the brand new jam to dance to. And also to let you all know that with Kansas' victory I took down the Fly Club tourney pool for the third consecutive year. And for the third consecutive year, next to no one paid so there is no payout. Being in it strictly for the glory, I'm not bothered by the lack of guap, but rather the absence of strong character, of honest participation in a cornerstone institution of American society. Clean it up, friends. Just like Ronnie.

Following Rodney's Lead

Well, it's official. Next week, from Wednesday to Friday, I'm making like Rodney Dangerfield and going back to school. I expect a nearly even balance of graduation-related catharsis and diet-related upset stomach. Fore! (Oh, I shoulda yelled 'two.')

Kind of Like Flossing

At this point I feel like we can be pretty honest with each other: it's mad hard to keep a blog going if you're any brand of normal. Go a few days without posting, and suddenly you're swimming upstream just to make like Whoopi Goldberg in Sister Act 2 and get back in the habit. I guess it's sort of like working out, but I tend to think of it more in terms of flossing. And I don't mean that in the Xzibit type of way. I'm talking about old school, string in hand, struggling for those back teeth flossing. If it's not a part of your routine it is literally impossible to start, and it takes like a year of doing it everyday to make flossing a part of your daily schedule. Basically, I'm just trying to say I'm sorry. Hi Andy!

Anyway, kind of a lot has happened in the past week or so. Mitt Romney dropped out of the Republican presidential race, the writers' strike is primed to end tomorrow, Herbie Hancock won album of the year, and Sleepy Pete had a string of four consecutive days that were all exactly the same. Incredible. Shattered the previous record of three consecutive days.

It's nice to get back in the saddle. But in truth, it's a bit itchy.

Civic Responsibility

Playing on MoreMax (one of the extra Cinemax channels) right now is a 1998 film that is actually entitled Johnny Skidmarks. According to the Time Warner Cable guide, this is not, as intuition might suggest, the tale of a date at a Mexican restaurant, but rather: "A shady photographer (Peter Gallagher) tries to avoid being killed." It would have been irresponsible of me not to have passed this along.